DC’S New 52- Green Lantern New Guardians #1

Written by Tony Bedard(Wrote an awesome series called R.E.B.E.L.S.) with art by Tyler Kirkham and Batt (Somewhere there is an artist named mann and they’ll be reunited….) Green Lantern New Guardians #1 does a very important thing..it brings Kyle Rayner back into the thick of it! I apologize to all the Hal Jordan fans, but when I was younger, Kyle was the shit!!! Hal was some grey-templed ass hat that tried to kill everyone in his path..then tried to apologize by reigniting the sun(Still doesn’t make up for killing your fellow corps members, Hal!!)

Douche!

So the story starts out with the origin of Kyle becoming a Green Lantern, but slightly tweeked.

Speaking of tweeked.

He becomes a Green Lantern and is barely on the job when rings from other Corps start showing up(The rings abandonded their masters and fled to Kyle). Along with those other rings comes other Corps members; all in a pissy mood, trying to find out who is stealing their rings!  Eep!!! Poor Kyle. 🙁

This issue was fun, light, and it had an origin that made a little sense…along with some action. Gee, I wonder who should learn how to do something like that?

Now get out of my office with that stupid hat on!

Tony Bedard certainly dropped the ball with Blue Beetle, but he comes out swinging with this new Green Lantern series. Well done, sir…well done.

One blog to rule them all, and in the darkness, bind them,

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- CatWoman #1

Written by Judd “Real World” Winick with beautiful art by Guillem March, CatWoman is an interesting read.

Before we go further I just want to state, CatWoman is not nor has she ever been…a tramp…she might have a bit of a flirtatious side to her, but never crazy slutty…slappin her trash all ova the streets!

That’s hot!

While I did enjoy Judd’s version of CatWoman I’m a bit torn with this slutty version we see before us…I mean, with Starfire turning tramp, it’s hard for me to think that young women across the nation are going to have a great role-model in DC’S New 52..it’s a bit jarring. Anyway, I’ll step off my soapbox now and move on to the story.

She sleeps with Batman…oops! sorry, right back up on that soapbox! OK, for real “steps back down”. This issue was a fun read, regardless of what they’re trying to do to Selina.

Selina Kyle’s apartment gets blown to bits due to a gang she seems to have pissed off! Homeless, she goes undercover to try and get some Intel on her next heist so she can land on her feet (Get it? Get it?!).

Awwww..already?!

Anyway, it all goes downhill for her from there…until she sleeps with Batman…BAM!

Oh yea…sooo HOT!

Catwoman #1 is a great, fun read for anyone not offended by her promiscuity, or this video:

I wanna be evil too!!!

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- Flash #1

Written by Francis Manapul and Brian Buccellato with beautiful art by Francis Manapul, Flash #1 is another one of those enjoyable comics I was telling you about! Light, fun, mysterious…leaps into the action with a delicate balance of story and action…it’s just fun!

I’m fun too!

We start out with Barry, on a date with a lovely lady from the same division as him, at some science expo.(How lame of a date is that?!)

I googled “Lame Date” and this picture popped up!

Some peeps crash the partay and the Flash leaps, or runs, into action! Little does he know that his actions will and does kill someone!!!!(maybe) So Barry is off, on a quest of science to prove what really did kill this bad dude. In the end the mystery is sorta solved(He isn’t dead…sorta) and there are a few “multiple issues” to deal with.

Multiple issues..like giving these two beers!

This is a great intro into the world of Barry and the Flash. It’s light, it’s a fast read, and it’s really fun. I highly recommend this to anyone!

Zipping through this Blog…in a FLASH!!!

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- Batman #1

Written by Scott Snyder with art by Greg Capullo, Batman was yet another entertaining read from the new DC 52. Scott Snyder, writer of one of my new favorites, Swamp Thing, takes Batman knee-deep into a mystery that has you saying “WTF” as you turn to the last page of issue 1.

Obviously Mr. Bean is confused.

The issue starts out with Batman, in Arkham, surrounded by his favorite Super Villains, fighting side-by-side with the JOKER…yep you heard me, the Joker!!!\

OK, now it’s more appropriate!

We learn why and how this happened a little later in the book just as another mystery reveals itself.

Batman #1 is a well crafted, mystery-laced issue that will have you feeling refreshed and excited for issue #2!

Not sure he’s excited, but he certainly looks refreshed!

I’d plop down my $2.99 for this issue in a heart beat…in fact, I did!

Your partner in this mystery,

Detective Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- Wonder Woman #1

Written by Brian Azzarello with art by Cliff Chiang, Wonder Woman is one of those fun books you breeze through on a sunday afternoon. Nothing too heavy, nothing too light,  just the right balance of action, adventure and mystery.

I very much appreciate that Brian is trying to place Wonder Woman heavily within Greek Mythology. Having her battle Gods ups the ante , making her vulnerable, and a bit less like Superman’s female half.

What are you talking about? I look great!

The story starts out with a “demon” using three women(Can you guess which Homer book we’re talking about here?) to tell him where to find the woman carrying Zeus’s child so that he may kill it. Pretty intense stuff, right?! With the assistance of Hermes, the woman gets whisked away to Dianna’s place for protection….it gets crazier from there!

Wonder Woman is BACK!

Oh you had your chance!

For a light, fun read, I highly recommend this book!

Trying on my Tiara,

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- Blackhawks #1

Written by Mike Costa with art by Graham Nolan, G.I. Joe…errr, Blackhawks is a decent edition to DC’s new line of comics. Mike does a fine job of introducing the main characters, yet keeping it light and fast-paced. I enjoyed the quick intro’s along with the humor..Irish is from Ukraine(read the bood to understand what I’m saying 😉

How about I start a small fire in your momma’s panties instead?

In the first issue we are introduced to Kunoichi, a sexy female operative with maroonish-colored hair and a tendency to be a bit pushy when it comes to her job and her personal life. While I did enjoy the quick intros, I am hoping for a bit more direction and depth to these characters unknown to mankind(for now).

Hey, I am one of the Unknown too! Let’s do drinks sometime!!!

I’d def. recommend this one over Men of War, but I’d still say pass on this one!

Not known if I’m Unknown, or if I knew what being known could know about me,

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- Supergirl #1

Written by Michael Green and Mike Johnson with art by Mahmud Asrar, Supergirl is another blah edition to DC’s new line of blah comics(Captain Atom, Green Arrow, Red Hood, etc.).

Why on earth(Or Krypton) do we need another reboot of Supergirl! She’s been redone more times than Dolly Parton’s boobs!!!

And apparently her face is melting!

I’m not sure what else to say…it’s not really worth your money, but if you’re going to go buy it, It will be difficult for me to talk you out of it. Let’s see if DC’s description of the first issue will help us in our cause:

Meet Supergirl. She’s got the unpredictable behavior of a teenager, the same powers as Superman – and none of his affection for the people of Earth. So don’t piss her off!

Yep, I’d make that face too.

so, in short…just save your money for something cooler….like a superman pez dispenser(yep, they make those!).

Not feeling so super,

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- I…Vampire #1

Written by  Joshua Hale Fialkov with art by Andrea Sorrentino, I…Vampire is part of DC’s New 52 relaunch, DC Dark. Now I’m not sure if I was just tired or drunk, but I just couldn’t understand what the hell was really going on in this issue. It went back and forth(I think?) In time as we learn(Sure we do.) that there is soon to be a Vampire Revolution or Revolt, or Whatever!

OK, so maybe I had a few!

In order to understand what the hell I had just read, I consulted our good friend, Wikipedia…Hit’em, Wik!

In 1591, after being turned into a vampire himself, Lord Andrew Bennett turned his lover, Mary Seward, into a vampire, and she became corrupted by the power. She took the name Mary, Queen of Blood and created a group of vampires called The Blood Red Moon bent on taking over the world. The series followed Bennett into the modern day as he tried to undo his mistake and take down Mary and The Blood Red Moon.

Thank you, good sir! Anyway, it’s a bit convoluted, but I really want this to work. There really isn’t a good vampire comic book dealing with elements inside the DCU, such as vampires versus superheros!

Marvel got it right!

I’d love to see Frankenstein take on a legion of vamps side-by-side with Ted Kord Blue Beetle and Booster Gold(Shameless plug for our web series.).

This one is only a must-read to those that thought twilight has to be replaced with something….anything!

Can you believe people are watching this crap?

Skip I…Vampire and spend your money on something worth your time.

Watched Twilight and almost died of stupidity,

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- Superboy #1

Can a clone develop a  conscience? This is the question presented in Superboy #1, written by Scott Lobdell with art by R.B. Silva and Rob Lean. As I have already read the turd that is Red Hood and the Outlaws, I was expecting more crap where at some point a cherished DC character becomes a whore….this didn’t happen.

Say what you will, but this is art!

Not only was I surprised by this issue, but I found it to be the most engaging superboy has been in years.

Hey, I’m engaging…right now!!!!

As DC describes it:

They thought he was just an experiment – and a failed one at that! Grown from a combination of Kryptonian and human DNA, the clone was no more than a set of data to the scientists of Project N.O.W.H.E.R.E. But when the scope of his stunning powers was revealed, he became a deadly weapon!

So we have this clone playing dumb, trying to figure out an angle…then we have scientists trying to create…then we have other “outside forces” manipulating the angles. It’s fast-paced, it’s fresh, it’s a decent read.

If you were a fan of supeboy in the past, or you have some spare pocket change,  I suggest you pick it up, otherwise, wait for the trade.

Cloned for Blogging Perfection,

Donnie Drama

DC’S New 52- The Savage Hawkman #1

Dear DC Comics, pleeeease cancel this title before I am subjected to more crappy versions of Hawkman. Hawkman is a B-List superhero and that is all he will ever be. He should be in the JLA or JSA or FDA…anything but his own title…ANYTHING!

No, You can’t write Hawkman, Fabian!

Written by Tony S. Daniel with art by Philip Tan, The Savage Hawkman starts off with Carter Hall trying to bury then shoot(Really?!) his Nth Metal from Hawkman. Why he thought this would work, I’ll never know! Then we are taken to a ship where a crew is hauling up a piece of alien craft out of the ocean. So Carter is taken to this ship where he realizes the aliens are dangerous and he is still Hawkman(duh!). Then the Alien creature they found in the craft attacks and all hell breaks loose. The story explains nothing why telling us little about what is going on or why.

Aliens ARE dangerous. This somabitch made me wet myself when I was 4!

The big problem is Hawkman’s story has been redone so many times he has no real history any longer. And with that, every writer that comes along, has to redo or re-imagine his origin. Don’t believe me, just let our good friend, Wikipedia tell you what’s what! Take it away Wik:

“Several incarnations of Hawkman have appeared in DC Comics, all of them characterized by the use of archaic weaponry and by large, artificial wings, attached to a harness made from the special Nth metal that allows flight. Most incarnations of Hawkman work closely with a partner/romantic interest named Hawkgirl or Hawkwoman.

Since DC’s continuity was rewritten in the 1985 series Crisis on Infinite Earths, Hawkman’s history has become muddled with several new versions of the character appearing throughout the years, some associated with ancient Egypt and some with Thanagar. These versions of the character have starred in several series of various durations.”

Anyway, long story short, Don’t buy this one…save your money and help “Fabian” buy a new Damn Hat!!!!

Your comic book pal,

“Savage” Donnie Drama